Humility – April 21, 2021

Well, I thought so, but I’m a weird duck.

First, a word from our sponsor…

In a bit of a snit today.  My list of lists has come up missing.  You better bet when I find it, I’m gonna make a list of where I keep my lists from now on.  Until I locate the “Master List,” I’ll not cease to plod along, but I’ll be out-of-sorts until it shows up.  Absence of the Master List will impede my progress; I’ll be working from memory.  Some danger in that?  Absolutely.  I may start and even complete tasks not on any current list.  Inefficient and priority disruptive.

Yes.  I’m one of those.  A list-keeper.  Not something new because of slower memory reflexes with advancing age.  Lists have been not so much necessary as a point of stability for me as far back as I can remember being near-adult.I will admit from a seminal single list, I’ve refined the process, functionally isolating list items by end-goals and who might have unwelcome interests in my daily progress into separate lists.

Someone who deals with me and my lists on a regular basis has gone so far as to suggest when I complete something not on a list,2 I add it to the list so I can then cross it off or put a check-mark3 beside it.  I’m going to let that one go.  If I deny, you’ll smugly assume I do add-just-to-cross-off.  If I ignore the suggestion, you’ll feel the supposition preposterous.  Consider the question ignored.

But there is simple-to-great satisfaction watching a list lose pending items.  A sense of accomplishment.  Confidence that nothing is being overlooked. 

Sure, I’ve lost Master Lists before.  On one or two occasions, I believe some foreign superpower snucked-in and stole them.  Up until recently, I’ve been successful re-constructing from memory.  Not without pain and calamitous delay.  Now, alas, age starting to wrinkle my grey cells, I’m never happy I’ve been entirely successful.

Sure hope I find this one.4

Humility

I think that you won’t never see
A guy as handsome as is me.
Beyond just handsome, I is smart.
In fact, I make of smarts an art.

Watch real close and you will see
Them girls in town they all love me.
Blonde, brunette, ginger, raven,
This handsome bod is what they’re craving.

Can’t hardly blame the ladies much
I got Moxy, muscles, charm, and such.
And when comes time to make a splash,
I got on hand sufficient cash.

We’ll ride my car, it’s fast and cool,
As around the town we wildly tool.5
Women line up to get their turn,
To help me all my moolah burn.

I’ve hardly started singing praise
Some finer points I’m yet to raise.
I offer this quite honestly –
It’s tough to stay hu-mil-ity.

(Apologies to Joyce Kilmer)

Notes

1 Near adult.  I guess since high school when it was assumed by many I should start acting responsibly.  Lists were at first a defense mechanism.  “Have you finished cleaning the holding stalls?”  Correct answer: “Not yet, but it’s on the top of my list.”  “Have you completed nominations for the Citizenship Committee?” Salvation: “No, but it’s on my list right after Varsity Club Alumni Basketball game planning meeting.”  Anyone snickering about “near adult,” suggesting at this late date I still struggle to be “adult,” – up yours!

2 If you suggest you have the steel to do only what’s on your list until your list is completed or you retire for the evening, you’re a bald-faced liar.  Aside assignments, if not of my own doing, are because I answer to a higher authority not bashful about rearranging my work.  Constantly.  Such phrases as, “when you get a minute,” “since you’re already in the kitchen,” “you don’t have to do it right now, but,” preamble redirection of my efforts.

3 But of course.  Individual items on different lists are marked ‘complete’ in different ways.  Easy-peasy lists get perfunctory checkmarks.  Piffle.  Done.  Next.  Long standing list items, those taking hours or even days or weeks rate vigorously drawing lines through the entry or scribbling over the item almost to the point of making it illegible.  There!  Done! Finally!  Whew!  Grocery lists items, I generally am forced to work from memory, forgetting to take a pen or pencil with me leaving the house.

4 Master Lists locate and hold temporary new candidate items for Yard/Garage/Honey-do, Pending Paperwork and Correspondence, Relocation Activities, WordPress Pending, Commercial Writing, Groceries, Next Big Boys’ Toy Store Forays, and, um, unh, one other list that presently escapes me.

5 Tool.  Ride. Cruise. Drag the Ave.

Published by spwilcen

Retired career IT software engineer, or as we were called in the old days, programmer, it's time to empty my file cabinet of all the "creative" writing accumulated over the years - toss most of it, salvage and publish what is worthwhile.

18 thoughts on “Humility – April 21, 2021

    1. Thanks fro looking in. Good to know list-making is not as much an aberration as some onlookers suggest. Judging from WPers, anyway.

    1. Thank you for dropping a comment. Yes, I feel (as one can see) oddly disoriented when one of my lists (there really aren’t that many) hides from me.

    1. Several WP buds will tell you Francisco, I struggle with poemetry. I do it because, well, it’s a phenomenal challenge. Do well to day, good sir. The weekend is upon us. Hope you are drier, warmer, and all caught-up with your lists.

      1. Not bad with one list, ignored another one but it’s been raining all morning, April in Valencia… Your poemetry is pretty cool I’d say, it is humour as I like it. Keep up the good work SP and enjoy Friday!

      2. Okay by you, Imma work on finishing-up Thursday first. Tomorrow, sitting behind the steering wheel, I’ll miss youse guys. Road Trips! When’d they become a righteous pain in the arse?

      3. Back. Decompressing. Rants bubbling-up. Some likely for severity and acid will not go public. Take me a couple of days to sort-out. Do good stuff, sir.

  1. Lists, absolutely yes. The occasional pleasure of seeing every item crossed off and starting a new one. A list of where you keep your lists, now there I think you’re onto something. A great read. Thanks SP. Oh, and the poem about humility gave me a good chuckle too.

    1. I made the Master chuckle! Lemme write that one down. With that accomplishment, I believe I’m done for the day. Have a grand weekend, Sir Hobbo.

      1. From Francisco’s comment, I see I tried to cheat you out of Friday. My apologies. Dreading the road trip, I guess, lost my head.

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: